HIC ET NUNC: HERE AND NOW

Son Jeremy, Granddaughter Iysa, Libby, son Jeff

Son Jeremy, Granddaughter Iysa, Libby, son Jeff

An Italian friend wrote to me: For six months now, two or three days a week, my mother goes to my brother’s recovery community and helps the girls design and make bags. In this way, my mother has the possibility to ‘stay close’ to my brother without ‘staying attached’ to him. When she works on the bags, it feels like all the suffering was not so important: we live “Hic et Nunc”, Here and Now. We are able to joke, smile, laugh, cry, be happy and above all be HIC et NUNC! How many times I’ve prayed to be able to live ‘here and now’ and not think about all the ifs, buts and whys. My family has found the possibility to grow in spite of sorrow. We are understanding how to stay close without being dependent.

My reflection: When Jeff was in active addiction, living in the present seemed impossible – my mind was a constant wash of regrets, past hurts and disasters yet to come. This didn’t serve me well and it didn’t serve our family. Jeff’s 14-year addiction is teaching me how to live “Hic ed Nunc” – to be mindful of the moments, the little victories. When I’m able to live in the present and without the ifs, buts and whys, life is more steady.

Today’s Promise to consider: Today, I will live ‘Hic et Nunc,’ the Latin term for ‘here and now.’ I will let go of yesterday’s sufferings, and I won’t obsess over the future. I will work toward staying close without staying attached. I will be grateful for the moments.

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8 Comments on "HIC ET NUNC: HERE AND NOW"

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Sue
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We really only have the here and now but it is so easy to dwell on the past and worry about the future. When my daughter was in recovery someone gave me a card with the poem Yesterday….Today and Tomorrow. I read it often and it helps me remember there is nothing I can do about yesterday and all the events that have passed. They happened, they cannot be undone, all my worries and prayers won’t change a thing. Then there’s always tomorrow and God knows I can worry myself sick about tomorrow. But as the poem says the sun… Read more »
Jon Frank
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Libby – During my Mom’s last days, we had a lovely Jamaican caregiver that put it this way…. Tomorrow is nothing but a Promissory Note, while yesterday; a cancelled check. Today is cash money. Live in the glory of today!

Jon

Barbara
Guest

After 3 years of heroin addiction, methadone then suboxone (still with heroin of course) my son is entering a treatment program. I am filled with great hope but yet I know there are disappointments ahead. I just had a bracelet made with the engraving; stagli vicino & se valiente (stay close and be brave) with “love, hope and pray” on the inside. I wish there was room for “here and now”.

Sue
Guest

Barbara
What a wonderful idea. I’m sure it will give you strength and courage whenever you look at it.

I will pray for your son as he enters this phase of life.

Carrie Miller
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I am fairly new with Al-anon, and a beautiful soul at this meeting approached me, and kept giving me her phone number…….she is now my sponsor and I could not move forward without her….she gave me your book to read, which I devoured in 3 days because I could not put it down. I am TERRIFIED that my 38 year old son will die from this , and I cannot stop it. I want to move him back into our home where I know he will be safe, but the rest of our torn apart family is DONE with this…..… Read more »