ADDICTION: THE JUXTAPOSITION OF ANGER AND LOVE

A mom wrote to me, I made this from your blog entry, The Two Sides of Addiction. The quote is a reminder to always love my addicted child and that I should never be ashamed because of it.

My reflection: I recently read a Facebook post from a mom stating how guilty she felt because she was furious with her heroin-addicted son. I understood well her internal conflict – the juxtaposing feelings of outrage and love. When my son was sick, I felt rage from the excruciating pain caused by the addiction, yet I still loved him dearly. 

Today’s Promise to consider: Bad, ugly, and hurtful behaviors are addiction’s trademarks, and they cut deeply into our hearts. Today, I’ll acknowledge the wide and conflicting range of feelings addiction generates. It’s OK to feel both anger and love.

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Sue C
Sue C
1 year ago

The worst did happen for my family. We lost my son to a Fentanyl overdose on Valentines Day 2019, he was 26 years old. I am grateful for having him in my life. His addiction has pushed me to become a better person, one that can now show love and compassion without judgement. Through the help of parent support groups and Al-anon and you Libby I can state for sure that the last thing i said to him was “I love you” and meant it with all my heart. He said “I love you too Mom.”

Clare
Clare
1 year ago
Reply to  Sue C

Sue

Thank you so much for this. What you wrote has made me realize that I too am a better person because of my son’s addiction. I haven’t felt that way on this journey until I read your comments. My son had issues form the age of 3 with behavior, bullying, etc. Then there were drugs and legal issues as he got older. I have been judged by so many that I vowed I would never do the same to another Mom with a “problem child”. That I would try to walk in her shoes. I believe I am able to do the same for my son because I have felt the pain of shame and desperation. We love so much as Moms it hurts. Blessings to you, Sue. And thanks for your words of wisdom.