A mother wrote to me: My son is an addict and is currently working on recovery, again. I’ve been down this road so many times before that it’s hard to be hopeful, but it’s impossible for me not to hope. During all the years we’ve battled this disease, I haven’t given up on him. I don’t know if that’s good or bad – it just is. Now that I’m older, I wonder if this is the way it’s going to be until I die.
My reflection: We must remain humble in the face of addiction because it is stronger than we are strong. Perhaps addiction’s most devastating effect is that it suffocates our optimism. As parents, we feel that we need to do something, but we don’t know what to do. We fear that the addiction will never end, and the truth is that it’s up to our children to choose sobriety.
Today’s Promise to consider: Relapse can serve as a deepening of our loved one’s resolve to get and stay sober. It highlights the magnitude of the problem and points to the imperative to work diligently at a program of recovery. As long as he attempts to remain abstinent, there is hope. Without hope, all is lost.3045
Each relapse eventually strengthens long term recovery. What is vital during the journey is to maintain appropriate boundaries while also making sure your addicted child knows he is loved, forgiven and welcomed back into the family when he is in recovery. In so doing you have set in motion the fuel “hope” needs to ignite long term recovery. Another important aspect of the recovery process is understanding the nature of the disease through education. This also will allow for appropriate communication skills with other family members and the addicted child. Unity within the family will shorten the addicted child’s recovery time.
” As long as he attempts to remain abstinent, there is hope.” And what if he doesn’t? 🙁