A mother wrote me an email message. This is part of it: I prayed to my Higher Power this morning to give me peace and serenity. I knew in my heart that I needed to make amends to someone. The circumstances are not important, but the motive is. By participating in a recovery community, I’ve learned that if I’m not part of the solution, I’m part of the problem. I am learning humility.
My personal reaction on the passage offering my above today: Part of Jeff’s recovery was to work through the steps of AA and I wanted to do the same. I started with enthusiasm, but when I got to Step Eight, Made a list of all persons we harmed and became willing to make amends to all of them, and then discovered that Step Nine required making amends to those people, I shuddered. My pride got in the way and I didn’t want to ask for understanding and forgiveness. I didn’t want to, but I did.
Through the power of the program, I’m learning humility. I’m learning that it’s OK not to be perfect or even close to perfect. My sons know I love them and I’ve asked them to forgive my shortcomings. My addicted son made his amends and so did his mother.
Today’s Promise to consider: I’ll check my pride at the door and make amends when I need to. Being humble takes courage. Humility and honesty are not for the weak. I can say, “I’m sorry.”
Very true words. As parents we tend to feel our child, the addict, is the only one who needs to make amends, but we learn through the process that this is just not the case. We all have a part in the addiction. The addict is not perfect and neither are we.
I agree, Cathy. So many hard lessons to learn when dealing with addiction, but many of them are life’s lessons. Love to you.