There is a Japanese story that, One day in the outhouse a worm fell on a sheet of ice. A compassionate soul saw this pitiable worm in great danger and deposited it in a place where it could be warm all night. The next morning it was dead. What the man thought of as good luck was not good luck for the worm. We’re wrong to think that what makes for the happiness or unhappiness of some does so for others as well.
from: The Song of Awakening by Yōka Daishi
My reflection, When Jeff was in active addiction, I felt certain that I knew when he needed to enter into a treatment facility. I felt certain that I knew when he needed psychological help. In time, I learned that what I thought wasn’t important or, oftentimes, even correct. He needed to make the decision, not me.
Today’s Promise to consider, We parents often feel that we know what is best for our children. I often forced Jeff into treatment centers, threatening him with some dire consequence. He submitted to my demands, but usually walked out after a few days. We can’t find happiness or peace or recovery for someone else. They must find it on their own. We, parents, can stay close and love them.