ADDICTION IS ISOLATION; RECOVERY IS CONNECTION

Tara Brach told this story: In the first week of life of a set of twins, each one was isolated in her respective incubator. One was not expected to live. A hospital nurse fought against the rules and placed both babies in one incubator. When they were together, the healthier of the two threw an arm over her sister in an endearing embrace. The smaller baby’s heart rate stabilized and her temperature rose to normal. Through connection and love, the weaker twin went on to live and thrive.

My reflection: When my son was in active addiction, the standard advice for parents was tough love. Although there were some aspects of merit to this thought, in Italy I learned a more effective approach for our family: “Stay Close. Don’t abandon him, but stay out of the chaos of his addiction.” By staying close, my son knew my boundaries, yet he also felt connected. He knew he was not alone in his battle.

Today’s Promise to consider: Today, let us remember Rumi’s words:

Through love all that is bitter will be sweet. 

Through love all that is copper will be gold.

Through love all dregs will become wine.

Through love all pain will turn to medicine. 

Let us join together in prayer that love will be the healing energy in our suffering ones’ lives.

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Pamela
Pamela
12 days ago

Always, always, Libby, you say the things that I need to hear.

Trish Costa
Trish Costa
11 days ago

I am trying with my daughter to set boundaries and show her love. How do you handle it when they do not stay within the boundaries, for example, I let her use the car to go to IOP and meetings but then she comes home hours late acting like it’s no big deal. Or I ask her location services to be on while using our vehicle and they never are she claims something wrong with the phone… I’m so anxious and frustrated.. she’s been out of rehab now for a week and 3 days.

Pat Nichols
Pat Nichols
10 days ago
Reply to  Trish Costa

Trish, I experience the same type of situation with my son. What I learned was this, if my child was not willing to abide by our boundaries then it was also likely they are not following their recovery plan either. This leads to relapse! So, I learned to be understanding and not angry, I learned to be forgiving and not disappointed, I learned to be loving and not frustrated, I learned to be patient and not anxious. The disease of addiction has to run its course. Our children find recovery in their own way and in their own time. Prayers for you and your daughter.

Linda
Linda
11 days ago

My friend has his medical license suspended and is now out of money as he blew thru all his retirement. My heart aches for him. I use to tell him he would lose everything if he continued down this path. I pray he survives this all.

Last edited 11 days ago by Linda
Joy
Joy
11 days ago

Love, always. It was so good when we found Libby, someone who understood how we travelled .. boundaries are good, necessary yes ,but trust your love. then you will not act out of fear or trying to fix .. love them right where they are. We can only love, love love. We parents of struggling ones know the meaning of true love. I think must be how God looks down weeping and still loves us

Mona
Mona
11 days ago

I just want to thank you for your mediations every Thursday, sometimes they’re the only thing that keeps me going