A recovering addict told me, You know, you can’t force sobriety on anybody. Cause Mum tried everything. She gave me money, didn’t give me money, made me go to rehab, didn’t make me go to rehab, drove down four or five hours to pick me up, and on the other hand left me somewhere. Nothing worked. No matter how many rehabs I’ve done or how many counselors or meetings I went to, I never got it, until one day I was just sick of it and had enough.
My reflection: Over the years, I tried countless ways to force sobriety on Jeff. I threatened him that if he didn’t go to rehab I would never give him another cent or allow him to come home again. One time, I told him that I would cut him out of my will. I cried, yelled and bargained. I would have sold my soul if that would have made the difference.
Today’s Promise to consider: We can try to force our loved ones into sobriety, and it might work for some. For my son, it never did. I learned that it didn’t matter if the treatment center had a swimming pool, horseback riding or massages. I learned that my son had to be ready to change, and that happened when the pain of his using became too much for him to bear. I thank God every day that he came back home to himself and us.