FINDING PEACE WITH ADDICTION: “I KICKED OUT THE LADIES IN THE ATTIC” 

A friend and mom of adult children, who battle addiction, wrote to me: Today I stay out of my kids’ business. I work a wonderful 12-step program, have a sponsor, and am a sponsor. Today my God is first in my life and I start every morning by asking, “What is Your will for me today?” I can hear my God talk to me clearly because I kicked out the ladies in the attic.

My reflection:  “I kicked out the ladies in the attic,” reminds me of the Buddhist term ‘monkey mind,’ which means restless, unsettled, confused, and cluttered. When my son was in active addiction, I needed to kick out the ladies in the attic. They did nothing but conjure problems that might occur and remind me of past resentments.

Today’s Promise to consider: I cannot control the actions of my suffering loved one, but I can control my anxious thoughts. My constant mental machinations help no one – not my addicted child or me. I will work my program, talk with others who understand addiction, exercise, meditate – I will do whatever it takes to stop the incessant chattering of “the ladies in the attic.”

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Jo Marie
Jo Marie
2 years ago

Libby,
Love all your thoughts and words that help millions. And….that photo is beyond description!

gptraveler
gptraveler
2 years ago

The “ladies in my attic” are interfering big time in my ability to enjoy my life. I worry way too much and way too often. I share with others who understand. Now I need to practice self care using exercise and meditation.

Suzan
Suzan
2 years ago

Suzy

Philip Colamarino
Philip Colamarino
2 years ago

A therapist once told me “you cannot win an argument with your wife. She has had the argument and all possible outcomes in her head at least a hundred times BEFORE she ever has it with you”. Seems to be female attribute to stir that mental pot trying to get the recipe exactly right. As a man I believe we can compartmentalize issues and leave them for another time. At times I envy you women your empathy, and at times I thank God I don’t have to be so involved.
Love you and your work.