A mother wrote to me: My son was handsome, respectful, smart, athletic, and funny. Unfortunately, at fifteen, he made a bad choice to experiment with drugs. His life and ours were never the same. He tried to get clean. In fact, he was clean for forty days before he died. I have been blessed with wonderful people in my life, but I know the average person looks down on people who do drugs. I wish other people could understand what our lives are like.
My reflection: Even with the recent public outcry about addiction and deaths, society often considers the addict an abyss of moral failure. People judge the family as non-caring, absent, abusive, or non-communicative. Those of us who have addicted children know that this illness doesn’t discriminate.
Today’s Promise: Judgment comes swiftly when people hear that our children are suffering from drug abuse. Society criticizes us and holds us at fault, but these are the chains of addiction. Maybe it’s impossible for others to understand the crisis we parents face when the nightmare of addiction enters our homes. Maybe it’s impossible for others to understand the toll it takes on the entire family and the countless efforts we make to stem the tide. I’ve come to realize that all I can do is educate myself, follow my heart, lean into my support group, and pray for my child’s healing.
Thank you for sharing. I needed this.
Thanks, Sandy, for writing. We walk together. xoxo
As I am a mother who has lost her three sons to addiction
This passage rings so true
I feel so judged
Dearest Joan, My heart aches for you. Three sons – all lost to addiction’s grasp. I can’t imagine the pain, the suffering, the constant sorrow. I’m deeply sorry. Please know that I’ll stay close to you in love and prayer. Always.
This is so true. Not until one walks in the shoes of a mom, do some people truly understand the grips of this disease on our children with hearts of gold.
Dear Pam, I agree. Those who understand the chaos of this disease have compassionate hearts of gold. I found support in the halls of Al-Anon. The folks in those rooms were my saving grace. xoxo
Thank you Libby.. this is so true
“But God”
Dear Karen, We walk together. My God bless us both and our families. xo
I feel your pain, I lost my son two months ago, it’s the hardest thing to go threw. I put my heart and soul into helping him but as a parent I can only do so much. He just made a bad choice. So all out there that looks down on the addition——
Don’t it’s a Disease / Don’t judge until you do walk in our shoes to understand it all.
God bring peace to all that is going threw this. There in God’s hand ✋ now.
Until we meet again my son ❤️❤️
Dearest Romayne, I’m deeply sorry that you lost your son. I can’t imagine the pain you feel, the deep suffering. You did everything you could to help him. You put your heart and soul into loving him. He knew you loved him with your entire being. I join you in love and prayer for all those suffering. I’ll stay close. God bless you.
My heart breaks in two for all the mothers who have lost their children. I’m so grateful my son is doing well, but I still feel the pain when people talk about “addicts”, “drunks”, etc, like they’re the dregs of society. I look at addicted people in a whole different way now, having lived the nightmare. Now I look at them as tortured human beings- somebody’s son or daughter, a mom or dad, sibling.
I also look at them as never being beyond hope. My son has come back to us…..he’s trying to work past all the wreckage. I pray it lasts. God bless you all
Dear Laurie, Yes, the suffering of mothers who have lost their children is immense. My heart, like yours, breaks for the never-ending grief. I can’t imagine the pain. I join you in prayer for all those who are suffering, and I also join you in celebration that your son is good today. He is an inspiration to all of us. We’ll hold on to hope and love. My love to you.