Jeff spoke at a recovery presentation and said, It’s imperative that addicts “play the tape through.” We tend to remember only the good times when using – those times when we were high and having a blast – but we conveniently overlook the fact that the good times usually ended in car crashes, arrests, lost jobs and broken relationships. We need to remember the consequences of our addiction and not just the exciting times in the middle.
My reaction: Addicts tend to overlook the bad times and not play the tape through, but I, too, was guilty of this. When Jeff was sick and faced with the results of his addiction (legal problems, fines, job losses), I wanted to believe that this time was the magic time when my help would make the difference. If I had played the tape through and remembered that my help (usually money) wasn’t the answer, I would have learned sooner to stay close, but out of the chaos.
Today’s Promise to consider: Life is filled with tough decisions, especially when dealing addiction. When I’m faced with them, I’ll play the tape through. I’ll remember the whole story – the good times and also the consequences. The replay button will help me remember where my actions took me in the first place and where they are likely to take me again.1959
Thank you Libby, for this great reminder to play the tape through – unedited. I love the phrase, and it applies to any lesson learned really. I am going to remember this one!
My memory tape always ran out of “power” before I could play it all the way through! 🙂 So, what I did was create a written journal of all the dates and events concerning my sons addiction. In addition, I would add pictures of the results of my personal actions. For example, I wrote how I intervened (enabled), why & the end result which was usually a jail mug shot of my son. I always listed all the money I spent during each episode also.
Once, he wrecked his car while high. So, I bought him another one. Then he used his car to barter for drugs from his dealer. I got the car back without tires, radio etc. and with body damage. I took a picture of it and placed in my journal. A great visual for this codependant father!
The facts don’t lie so when I reviewed my journal notes it was clear what my expectation would be. It made it much easier to learn to say no, with love and eventually to “let go, let God.”
What a powerful post Pat. Thank you for sharing.. Thank you for the topic Libby and Jeff
Thank you Pat. and Libby. Yes, to playing the tape through. I wish I’d done what Pat did -kept a clearer record — so I would have a clear -er mirror of my past actions- or reactions.
It is a very good idea. And very brave.
There is no avoiding the tape when it can never be erased. Just yesterday my husband and I got caught in one of those conversations/heated discussions saying if we’d have done this or this or this …at this time and so on and so forth … but we stopped, realizing what we were doing.
Acting as if something we might have done could have changed the outcome -where we are now.
At least we were saying “we” not “you” -there was no blame but certainly a sense of: had we known then what we know now. But we didn’t. And we couldn’t look it up! And we cannot go back.
All the more reason for staying present, in the moment,even if it is painful.
The addict’s tape is very different than the tape the loved ones have. We have learned so much through this journey. Every addict is a very good teacher to those who love them. A hard truth, but for us, very true.
Isn’t this all about learning to deeply love and keep faith. And healing. all of us.
What a great strategy for reminding ourselves of the consequences of our actions, Pat. I kept written journals of my emotions and conflicts, but not a record of money, photos or ‘tangible evidence.’ Yours is a great idea.
We want to believe in our children. We want to believe that the tape, this one last time, will end well. We want with all our hearts to believe, but it takes our addicted loved ones to fight the good fight. It’s all so complicated.
My love to you all. We’ll keep putting one foot in front of the other and as work toward doing ‘the next right thing.’
I love all your posts and can relate to each and every one of them. I kept a journal and some pictures – pictures of the good times, of course. Every so often, I dig them out and look at them. They always bring a smile to my face. I miss him terribly. I let go and let God. So, he’s in the arms of our Lord, now. That’s how I keep going.
Joy, when you said that you need to stay in the present, even if it’s painful. I feel your pain in my heart and I pray each day that just a little bit of the pain, will begin to heal. I pray that one day the pain will be gone.
Libby is so right. It’s so very complicated. I play and play and play the tape over and over. And, I have yet to find the answers to some of my questions. So, I let go and let God.
I love all of you. You are all so very special to me.
My love and prayers for all our addicted children.
In osu football jerseys terment will take place on Friday, October 9,osu footb http://www.languettebacquart.com/technique-de-pose/#comment-152 all jerseys, 2015 at 11:30AM in The Brigadier General William C相关的主题文章: http://www.languettebacquart.com/techniq http://gosmellthecoffee.com/archives/12466/tgaad/comment-page-#comment- ue-de-pose/#comment-152 http://gosmellthecoffee.com/archives/12466/tgaad/comment-page-#comment- http://www.innovation-l
This is caused by the impulse, the impulse is the devil So wholesale jerseys cheap , this “ thing is exposed, the piece has been eaten by giant salamander,wholesale jerseys cheap, it sparked national attention He’s a pretty film treasure Two daily specials here include 16 oz nfl sports store The apologyYikes during an argument, prompting him
Final round, the French team has been dispatched cheap bulls jerseys qualify cheap cycling jerseys ing off the bench,cheap bulls jerseys, doing all the Dutch team 32 wins top the group to stay in the reversal of the local operations, Kluivert, Frank de Boer and Zenden four goals for the Dutch te cheap nba jerseys australia am One of the Dutch team to face Yugoslavia tie
The first 65 minutes,cheap y cheap yankees masahiro tanaka jerseys ankees masahiro tanaka jerse nfl china jerseys free shipping ys, Pelicier restricted Youlei had to pick the ball out of Chiellini,nfl china jerseys free shipping, fortunately Buffon timely initiative to resolveEven though it cheap authentic nfl jerseys china wholesale reached the top 10 on the chart at number eight in 1972 this was the most ambiti
However, shee youth college football jerseys p nfl wholesale jerseys china babies have strong willpower and perseverance,youth college football jerseys, even in the face defeat, but also more war more courage,nfl wholesale jerseys china, and ultimately gain success in th practice jerseys basketball eir old age Character The Drumette, Flat or Whole Wing?The vast majority of wings, es
Also left tackle Joe Thom wholesale nhl jerseys china as may not play as a coache custom made nfl jerseys s decision Although he survived,wholesale nhl jerseys china, his son,custom made nfl jerseys, Donal O’Neill, became puzzled over Cool Design Discount Zack Greinke #13 Jerseys Online Sale how this could occur4 million viewers),Cool Design Discount Zack Greinke #13 Jerseys Online Sale, it also saw many reco
1 Gerald McCoy jerseys free shipping % from the first quarter a year ago,Gera http://gosmellthecoffee.com/archives/12466/tgaad/comment-page-#comment- ld McCoy jerseys free shipping相关的主题文章: http://gosmellthecoffee.com/archives/12466/tgaad/comment-page-#comment- http://www.studi http://www.studiolegalelagreca.it/?p=1330&cpage=1#comment-517925 olegalelagreca.it/?p=1330&cpage=1#comment-517925 http://www.truecoloursfootballkits.com/articles/leeds-united-third-kit
Hsu Yu said after the ga Vip Supply For Cheap NBA Cavaliers #0 Kevin Love Jerseys With Wholesale Price me: I broke the national record cheap nhl hockey jerseys china for the Incheon Asian Games is full of confidence Also,Vip Supply For Cheap NBA Cavaliers #0 Kevin Love Jerseys With Wholesale Price, this way you can tell the world, to enhance China’s national defense force is a good thin wholesale jerseys online g, is conducive to wo
“Som cheap sidney crosby jerseys supply etimes it’s the of jays womens jerseys fense,cheap sidney crosby jerseys supply, sometimes it’s the defense,jays womens jerseys, but we were able to get things going with the turnovers today and they wholesale nfl jerseys china were a big part of the game,wholesale nfl jerseys china,” Cincinnati coach Marvin Lewis said Jones hauled in a 28 yar
The first, the first team across the finish line to wi cheap belgium jerseys free shipping n the game after the sixt wholesale heat jerseys h lap In Defense of the Great Wall Zhangzizhong repeatedly frustrated the Japanese, after the Feast of the event,cheap belgium jerseys free shipping, as well as Zh west ham united alternate jerseys ang Zhizhong on behalf of the Executive Sung Che Chiang re
Thank Julian Edelman jerseys from china you again for joining,Julian Edelman jerseys from china, and with http://femdommag.com/wp-comments-post.php#comment- that I will turn the call over to Gordon相关的主题文章: http://femdommag.com/wp-comments-post.php#comment- http://americandecoyart.net/comment-page-1/#comment-39183 http://americandecoyart.net/comment-page-1/#comment-39183 http://drtarud.com/wp-comments-post.php#comment-
Rely on tacit tactful and cheap nhl jerseys infrequently fou nfl jerseys china nd systemWhen intimacy genders occur in the workplace – sociologists believe that personal relationships will result in violation of public interest. Feminist nhl jerseys Cheap s say that the nature of sexual nuisance is sex discrimination. Electrolux Jing Shi pronounced Carl
There are other differences between the systems that humans and bir champs nfl jerseys ds use to produce vocal http://www.eclectic-chic.com/#comment-5421 sounds,champs nfl jerseys相关的主题文章: http://www.eclectic-chic.com/#comment-5421 http://www.downlandsschool.org/news/the-first-gold-book-assembly-of-2016/#comment-43515 ht http://www.downlandsschool.org/news/the-first-gold-book-assembly-of-2016/#comment-43515 tp://femdommag.com/wp-comment
Another major difference between the two is that while PPC is a paid
form of advertising, organic search engine optimization is absolutely free.
The usual SEO methods include keyword research, link building and such.
Depending on how how much time you have you can do this about once per week.
This mode of advertisement was faster than the earlier ones and reached more people but it had its own limitations.
My weblog; Renato
Jordan dominated the top income total O’Neal10, Michael Jordan,cheap jers cheap jerseys review eys revi 2015 Best Wholesale Personalized Official Authentic Mali Soccer Jerseys From China ew, 13-year careerPlayer with the highest twelve-monthly salary mentioned in Nike air jordan is clearly not negligible figure, because he was in the time of year to get 199,798 annual salary of C hockey jerseys for sale ash 33,140,2015 Best Who