A mom wrote to me: So often with addiction we want to wipe the slate clean and start over which, of course, is not possible. Here is a quote I came across and thought you would find it interesting: Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending. I like the sound of this! I always found it depressing that a new start didn’t solve the problem so the idea of a brand new ending is comforting to me.
My response: Jeff once wrote, “Addiction has changed my life, made me a different person, and in many respects my life is richer because I was forced to confront myself, or die. My past is my past and I can’t turn it around or change the footsteps that follow me.” He learned that he couldn’t wipe the slate clean, but he could create a brand new ending. And he did.
Today’s Promise to consider: Our histories are ours, and they provide valuable opportunities from which we can learn. Every day offers another start, a fresh chapter or a new page in our life. The challenge isn’t about not getting knocked down, but is learning how to get back up again.
I like the idea of creating a brand new ending. Thank you Libby, for such positive insight.
Dear Jane, Nanci, Pat, Penny, Hope and all the parents who participate regularly in this blog,
For you, I pray, every day, for a brand new ending.
With lots of love,
As I read your lovely message, my heart ached realizing that you understand ‘new endings’ much more than I do. You lost your son, and you were forced to create a new ending. Let’s continue to keep each other in prayer. You bring me strength. My love to you,
Dear Barbara, Thank you so much for your prayers, they are appreciated more than you know. I continue to gather strength from your experience as you have been forced to create your new ending and I know if you can do that, if circumstances warrant I will be able to do it as well. I pray daily that you find peace in this un-peaceful world.
Dear Libby, I can’t thank you enough for this blog. I am so grateful I was “directed” to it. I continue to find hope in the words I read here.
Love to all,
Barbara you are such a special person. Thank you for your prayers. We are so lucky to have you on this blog for your loss is great and yet you are the one helping us with your wisdom and strength. This is a difficult journey that none of us would choose yet we are all blessed to know eachother through our common denominator. Peace to all of you
Words can’t express my appreciation for each of you.
We need each others support, prayers, insights, hope and experience.
God bless each of you and continued prayers for every parent of an addicted child.
Dear Libby, I am grateful to have found this site and the book you wrote. In your first chapter, the first paragraph, i felt like you were writing from the words felt and held within my heart. You wrote:
“But look deeply into a mother’s eyes and tell her that her child is dying and it’s not her fault. Sure, it makes sense if it’s not your child. But for a mother to do nothing to stop the pain, to alter its course ~~~ is it possible for a mother not to feel guilt, shame, intense hurt? Maybe for some, but I’m not that mother. For me, I think I will wear this like a skin. Maybe I’ll forget I have it on sometimes, but it will be forever part of my being, my eyes, my smile, my thoughts ~~ like a breath that catches me short or my heart when it misses a beat. That’s it, Jonathan is my heart murmur ~~ I have allowed his aches and traumas to damage my heart, and sometimes I feel it is beyond repair. Maybe this isn’t the case for other parents, and maybe I’m wrong, or not healthy for thinking this way. But this is what I feel, this is my heart.”
Today I am looking for that beauty of serenity ~~ yet i am not close to achieving this feeling. You truly know the debth of how my heartaches for my son Jonathan ~ Right now he is on the street, I do not know how he is, only that he is in God’s hands ~~thank you again for sharing your story ~~ Always blessing, mary beth
Dear Mary Beth,
We’ll join you in prayer for Jonathan. He is in God’s hands, and we’ll continue to believe.
When a baby learns to walk, they fall many times.!They never let that fall defeat them. They get right back up and try again.Rheu don’t stop tying until they learn how to master the skill. One step at a time. The courage t& strength they show is truly amazing
You’re right, Danielle. It takes courage to fight an addiction – courage and strength. We’ll stay close. xo