Dr. MacAfee told me, There is a difference between willingness to change and readiness to change. Many times an individual has a moment of clarity when he becomes willing to see his situation, reaches out for help, or even stops using for a while. However, willingness doesn’t mean he is ready to stop using. Moving from willingness to readiness happens when the consequences of using become more painful than the use. This begins the crises. The decision to stop using is in the addict’s hands.

My reflection: The difference between being willing and ready is clear to me, especially when I reflect on Jeff’s words that he wrote eight years ago, I was done using and I knew it. Even my bones knew it. My obsession to use with control and temperance had disappeared. I saw where things were going and knew that if I didn’t stop, I was inches away from another devastating run. I’d been in the same space countless times before and chose differently – this scenario was familiar and it always ended badly. Before getting out of bed, I called a friend from treatment who was still sober and active in the program. I explained my situation and he understood. Things changed that day. 

Today’s Promise to consider: I understand that recovery is a painstaking process, a time of transformation when our loved one shifts from the person he was and becomes the person he wants to be. When the consequences of his addiction have worn him truly thin, he follows his road home. It is a deeply personal revelation that only he can navigate.